30 Oct 09

30 Oct 09

I was discharged today. After reaching home, my family called Dez to go back to the hospital. Without going into the details, Dez had a disagreement with them. After which, Dez visited Charlene and accepted Jesus Christ into his life. The gist of the impromptu vows were:-

“Lord, You have touched my heart with Your grace and mercy. Though I have known you through all the books I’ve read, I’ve never wanted to convert. But the experience of Your touch (last night) has moved me more than all the knowledge about You. I will open my heart to You, and invite You into my life; please guide me in all aspects of my life. Regardless of Your plans for Charlene, be it that she is restored fully, be it that she become a disabled kid, or be it that she perished, Lord, my faith in You will not change, because Lord, after knowing Your grace, nothing can come close to Your presence.

29 Oct 09

29 Oct 09
1230am – Dez received a call from the doctor who told him that Charlene’s prognosis is poor and is likely to have brain damage and the doctors are still trying to control the seizures. With so much uncertainty ahead, Dez broke down and cried. He wanted to wake up his brother to seek some support, but his father was in the living room (watching dvd) and he was not able to do so.

Not knowing what to do, he smsed his friend (Melissa) asking her to pray for Charlene. He didn't expect any response as it was really late at night. After smsing, he felt a sense of peace and calm. It was a divine moment for him, as he did not understand why the turbulent emotions was calmed so soon after the msg to Melissa. His only explanation was that Melissa (a strong christian) prayed for him, and God, hearing the prayers, grant him peace.It was then that he felt that God is with him and he was able to fall asleep after that.

Medical Social Worker (MSW) came to counsel us. At this stage, we didn’t habour any hope that Charlene will live. MSW advised us to break the news in bits and pieces to our family members.

The doctors are increasing the medications (4 medications) as they find it difficult to control the seizures. The medications caused Charlene to be heavily sedated and hindered her normal brain activity.

28 Oct 09

28 Oct 09

I got myself off the bed onto the wheelchair to go see Charlene. Seeing her was a shock. She had many tubes on her body and was heavily sedated. Doc said that the EEG showed that Charlene was having seizures and they are trying to control it with medications. The doctors have also proceeded with many tests to determine the cause (genetic, metabolic, etc…) which is crucial to control the seizures successfully.

27 Oct 09

27 Oct 09

0012 – Charlene was born (at week 34). She weighed 1855g, 40cm long, head circumference 32cm. As she is premature, she was put in Special Care Nursery.

However, she was then sent to NICU for observation due to shallow breathing and lethargies. A doctor called me in the afternoon and said Charlene exhibited some jitteriness and that may be a cause for concern. When Dez visited her, she had the “wanting to cry but cannot cry look”.

26 Oct 09

26 Oct 09

It was a routine checkup with the gynae. But as we looked at the ultrasound machine, his face told me that something was not quite right. Dr Ang said that aminotic fluid is low and hooked me up on the ECG machine to check baby’s heartbeat. ECG results show that baby’s heartbeat is irregular and baby is in distress. Dr Ang told us to check in to the hospital for observation.

More ECG checks of baby’s heartbeat at KKH and at 11+pm, the doctors said that they can’t wait anymore and pushed me in for emergency C-section.