Nice photos of Charlene

Dez was looking through the old photos and came across some good photos (that we didn't know we had).

Charlene's sitting in the car seat and waving "hi" to the camera.

Queen Charlene sitting regally in her "throne" (which is her mummy, daddy, grandma and grandpa or whoever is carrying her). She wants to be in her "throne" all the time in the day.

Charlene in her koala bear position. No prizes to guess which picture is the mummy/daddy tummy.

Charlene and her bian zhui expression.

And our favourite photo... Charlene with her cute pleading expression. Doesn't she remind you of the Puss-in-boot of Shrek? =)

29 June 10

Charlene is still very cranky in the day. It's very weird. She would be sleeping in the morning (tat's the time I read the Bible, pray or play DS Lite). And all of a sudden at 11+, she would wake up and start crying non-stop. And it will take very long before she is comforted. And this will go on and off throughout the afternoon but once the sun sets and night falls, she becomes the quiet and good Charlene.

And after she cried, feeding her milk immediately will result in vomiting.

We thank God that we are somehow coping with it. One thing we do know is Charlene is a clean girl. So we check and ensure Charlene's wet gauze, diaper and shirt gets changed. If all that is done and she is still crying, we have to rock, pat, sing song etc. And if it still doesn't work, we just have to wait till she stops. Maybe, it's the 'phlegm' (not too sure if it is or salivia) that is making her uncomfortable. Sometimes I put her in prone and she is able to quieten down and sleeps.

I really don't know why she is so cranky in the day. A few possible reasons.
1. Her brain damage resulting in her inability to control her emotions and behaviour
2. Side effects of anti-convulsants
3. Temperature in the day too hot for her
4. She is uncomfortable but we fail to satisfy her needs
5. Evil spirits

And something is freaky also. If the day is a good day, i.e. 0-1 episodes (seizures) or frequency of vomitting, when we talk about it or think about it, almost immediately things will start to go wrong and go the other way. And we start to think that it is a taboo to say and behave like superstitious individuals. It must be the devil's way to make us do such things to draw us away from God.

We will not be afraid and will continue to trust in the Lord with all our heart!

23 June 10

Charlene is very cranky today. After I fed her halfway, she started crying and the button started leaking. As I was cleaning the stoma, milk was gushing out that I panicked and lost my cool. That obviously didn't help as Charlene cried even louder. I was very pissed as time is running out (taxi coming soon at 1245pm as she is supposed to go to KKH for physiotherapy). Also, the leakage is very bad and the gauze that I changed was soaked almost immediately. And cos she was crying non-stop, I couldn't continue feeding her.

I was very angry and called Dez to express my irritability. And it didn't help that my fil kept saying unconstructive comments showing his lack of understanding of the whole matter. I seriously didn't want to bring Charlene to KKH but Dez said that it wouldn't matter since staying at home doesn't mean she will stop crying (which is the truth).

Thank God for the nice taxi uncle who waited for 15 mins till 1pm without starting his meter. Charlene cried her way to KKH and through the whole physio session.

After I diligently rolled her almost everyday, her rolling has improved! Thank God! And her head control and neck muscles are better too. The therapist told me to add another exercise; turn her head in prone position (which was something Charlene could do when she was very small but due to lack of practice, she had forgotten how to). Charlene finally slept soundly at the end of the physio session after being put in prone.

The occupational therapist came to check on her cortical thumbs while she was asleep. Her left thumb has gotten straighter as the muscles are more relaxed but her right thumb still needs more stretching.

At the end of the day as I reflected, I found myself to be like the Israelite (in the Old Testament), always complaining and whining to God. I should count my blessings. God is good! Charlene is improving!

22 June 10

For the past few days, Charlene has been very cranky especially in the day. If it's because of wet diaper, wet gauze or hungry, she will stop crying once her needs are satisfied. But sometimes, we don't know what she wants. She just keeps crying non-stop even when she is carried.

I wonder if she lacks water. But the surgeon has specifically told me not to pump in water unnecessarily.

We are currently feeding Charlene every 2.5hrs. We pray that we can transit her to 3 hourly feeds successfully. We pray also that she can take in more milk for the current amount is obviously too little for her weight that it is a miracle that she is still growing...

21 Jun 10

Two of our friends visited us today. All 4 of us had a great chat about random stuff in the room, with Charlene sleeping soundly.

As typical of Charlene, she behaves properly in front of visitors. No crying, no tantrums.

Hence we welcome all visitors (2 or 3 persons) to visit Charlene (and grant us some peaceful days/evenings =D). Just let us know early, and we can plan you according to Charlene's feeding time.

20 June 10

We received a cheque from an anynomous person from our church. We thank him/her for the love gift.

We thank God for His providence.

We also like to thank our church (Yishun Methodist Mission) for keeping Charlene and us in prayers. And also our friends, colleagues and relatives and the many fellow Christians (whom we do not know, from New Creation Church, Providence Presbyterian Church, Covenant Evangelical Free Church) for praying for us as well.

19 June 10

It's Dez birthday today. Yesterday (18 June), I told Charlene many times to smile at Daddy tml cos it's Daddy's birthday.

Charlene woke up early, 8am. Dez and I were talking to her. And she smiled. Not those wide grin or beam but she really smiled. It was her best effort ever (not those half-smiles that we have been writing about). We were very happy. Though we know she may not smile again soon, we are glad her smile is improving. And once again, she proves herself to be a good girl (listened to her mummy).

Thank you Lord for the encouragement!